Aku TIDAK MALU bermula DARI BAWAH

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim......

Kehidupan di Taylors College dan Casa Subang telah banyak mengajar aku erti hidup.
Sekarang aku sedar siapa aku, tiada apa yang perlu dibangga-banggakan. Banyak lagi kawan-kawanku di sini yang hebat-hebat dan menjadi sumber inspirasiku.
Bak kata cerdik pandai, " di atas satu langit, ada langit yang lain ".
Aku sedar aku perlu berubah dan belajar.
Aku perlu belajar merangkang dahulu, bertatih dan berjalan, kemudian baru berlari.
Mana mungkin aku hendak terus bisa berlari. Kerana sudah sunnatullah begitu. Semuanya berperingkat-peringkat=)

Banyak yang perlu diperbaiki, dipelajari, difahami dan diamati.
Aku TIDAK MALU untuk BERMULA DARI BAWAH.
Apa yang nak dimalukan, setiap yang hebat bermula dari bawah juga.
Ya Allah, bagiku kekuatan untuk memerangi diriku sendiri.
Terlalu banyak yang perlu disucikan dari jiwa ini.
Cabaran yang terbesarku kini ialah HAWA NAFSUku sendiri.
Ia masih belum MAHU TUNDUK pada SYARIATMU.

Terbaca satu artikel yang sesuai dengan diri waktu ini.
Diselitkan ayat Allah yang berbunyi begini.

" Dan orang-orang yang berjihad untuk ( mencari keredhaan Kami ) benar-benar Kami akan menunjukkan kepada mereka jalan-jalan Kami. " (29 : 69)

Aku ingin menjadi orang yang berjihad itu.
Berjihad dengan sebenar-benar jihad.
Sesungguhnya melawan hawa nafsu itu juga jihad.

Untuk melawan hawa nafsu kita perlu kenal ia terlebih dahulu.
Ada tiga tahap.
Nafsu ammarah (selalu menyuruh kpd kejahatan)
Nafsu lawwamah (terumbang-ambing antara kebaikan dan kejahatan)
Nafsu mutmainnah (hati yang tenang dan damai mengabdikan diri kepada Allah)

Aku berada di tahap yang kedua.
Ingin sekali aku berada di tahap yang ketiga.
Ya Allah bantu aku kesana.
Beri aku kekuatan dan kesabaran.
Kerana jalan ini bukan untuk orang-orang yang manja seperti aku.
Perlu pengorbanan untuk kesana.

Ku ulang pada diriku sendiri.
Liza, JANGAN KAU MALU UNTUK BERMULA DARI BAWAH.

Wallahu'alam~

Mencari~

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim......

Hidup bagaimanakah yang engkau rasa bahagia

Penuh makna ada cita

Diri yang sudah tidak lagi punya pertimbangan

Menerima apa sahaja
Dalam pencarian menentukan arah tujuan

Berbekalkan hanya perasaan

Hanya mengikut arus perjalanan rakan-rakan

Juga gaya teman-teman
Wahai sekalian rakan

Dengarlah, ini pesanan

Kami adalah teman

Yang inginkan kebaikan
Pencarianmu itu

Tak ada kesudahannya

Jika kau tak bertanya

Pada Tuhan yang memberikan jawapan
Telah dinyatakan tujuan kita diciptakan

Bukan untuk ini semua

Masa depan agama dan nasib yang tak terbela

Semuanya di tangan kita
Pemuda yang semangat jihadnya teguh di hati

Tidak akan gentar dicabar

Tinta emas yang mencatatkan sejarah gemilang

Telah pasti ia kan berulang
Yang perlu hanya kesedaran

Bersama diri yang ada kekuatan

Iman dan kesabaran

Yang mesti diusahakan
Banggalah dengan gayamu

Hidup seorang pejuang

Nyatakan pada dunia

Masa depan untuk Islam, untuk kita

dipetik dr saifulislam.com=)

Aku dan Masa Laluku

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim.......

Aku dan masa laluku
Masa lalu yang berhantu
Sehingga aku selalu bersedih
tanpa henti tanpa misi tanpa aksi

Kata sahabatku,
" Kenapa liza nak bersedih dgn masa lalu, 1 detik yang berlalu kita dah consider it as semalam, semalam2 sejarah, hari nie kita punya, esok x siapa tahu, jadi setiap detik baru mulakanlah dgn niat dan azam yang baru "

Kata sahabatku lagi,
" liza, learn from the past, don't live with it "

Kata sahabatku lagi,
" sampai bila liza nk harapkn kitorg utk selalu naikkn semangat liza time liza down?? "

Kata sahabatku lagi,
" it's within urself liza, let it go, don't think about it anymore, forget it "

Kata sahabatku lagi,
" Allah paling suka hambaNya apabila dia melakukan kesalahan dia terus bertaubat "

Aku telah banyak kali dengar kata2 itu
Bukan sekali, dua atau tiga
Berkali-kali

Kukatakan padanya aku berhati lembut berjiwa degil
Adakah benar aku begitu?
Ya..dan tidak juga

Kadang-kadang hati ini terasa letih
Letih kerana masih menyimpan perasaan itu
Masih berharap suatu yang palsu
Mengikut hawa nafsu

Namun jauh di sudut hati, aku tahu
Aku tahu apa yang aku mahu
Apa yang aku mahu???

Aku dan masa laluku
Akan teruskah begitu??
Belum mahu lagikah aku biarkan ia berlalu???
Liza, biarkanlah ia berlalu
Itu masa lalumu
Kesat air matamu
Buang angan2 palsumu
Hela nafas baru
Mula langkah baru

Aku dan masa laluku
Aku ingin jauh darimu
Pergi, pergi, jauh kau dariku
Jauh, jauh, usah kembali padaku

p/s: nie post pertamaku y terlalu sentimental...harap maklum=)

Why i WANT to have my OWN BLOG??

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim......

Now most of us have our own blog. It has become a trend. I asked myself, why i chose to write here?am i just following the trend?to impress people?

I still remember how eager was I at the first time creating my own blog. I did burden my friends with my eagerness. They have to teach me how to create a blog and the settings it needed. haha...it was funny...because i did screw up my 1st blog n act this is the 2nd one.....(if u notice, lar~)

I started blogging since March 09...still new....
Act....I don't like writing....I prefer talking.....I'm very talkative....need to reduce it...hehe~
But, I love reading others' blogs. Kind of addicted to some blog right now. Then, i decided to have one of my own. Just a simple space where i can post something to remind me, to record my journey in seeking my trueself. It's a kind of personal blog right now and most of the posts are about me and my thoughts and feelings. I'm just sharing here, not yet giving.

This post is actually to remind myself about my niat of having and writing this blog.
Blogging is not just a trend, blogging not just to impress people, blogging not to get popularity,
ask ourself what blogging is for?
It can be more precious and meaningful if we write here for Allah's bless. Sharing something than can bring us closer to Allah. InsyAllah=)

To all bloggers out there, continue sharing because sometime we learn from you...from your experiences, from your sadness and joy, from your success and failure, and life is also about sharing right?Let's share for Allah's sake=)

Wallahu'alam~

I'm too busy!!!

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim.....

Everyday as I wake up at dawn

My mind starts working the moment I yawn

There were many things to do, o dear!

That’s why I hastily did my Subuh prayer

I didn’t have time to sit longer to praise the Lord

To me rushing out after prayer is nothing odd….

Since school, I had been busy every minute

Completing my tutorials and handing it in

My ECAs took up most of my time always

No time did I have to Allah to pray

Too many things to do and zikir is rare

For Allah, I really had no time to spare…

When I grew up and started my career

Working all day to secure my future

When I reached home, I preferred to have fun

I chatted on the phone but I didn’t read the Quran

I spent too much time surfing the internet

Sad to say, my faith was falling flat…

The only time I have left is weekends

During which I prefer window shopping with friends

I couldn’t spare time to go to the mosque

I’m too busy, that’s the BIG EXCUSE…

I did my five prayers but did so quickly

After prayer, I didn’t sit longer to reflect quietly

I didn’t have time to help the needy ones

I was loaded with work as my precious time runs

No time at all to visit a sick Muslim friend

To orphans and elderly, I hardly lent a hand

I’m too busy to do community service

When there were gatherings, I helped the least

My life is already full of stress

So I didn’t counsel a Muslim in distress

I didn’t spend much time with my family

Because I thought, doing so is a waste of time…

No time to share with non-muslim about Islam

Even though I know, inviting causes no harm

No time to do Sunnah prayers at all

All these contribute to my imaan’s fall

I’m busy here and busy there

I’ve no time at all, that’s all I care

I went for religious lessons, just once in a while

‘Coz I’m too busy making a pile…

I worked all day and I slept all night

Too tired for Tahajjud and it seemed not right

To me, earning a living was already tough

So I only did basic deeds but that’s not enough…

No time at all to admire God’s creation

No time to praise Allah and seek His Compassion

Although I know how short is my life

For Islam I really didn’t strive…

Finally the day comes, when the Lord calls for me

And I stood before Him with my Life’s History

I feel so guilty because I could have prayed more

Isn’t that what a Muslim lives for?

To thank Allah and do more good deeds

And the Quran is for us all to read…

Now at Judgement Day, I’m starting to fret

I’ve wasted my life but it’s too late to regret

My entry to Paradise depends on my good behaviour

But I’ve not done enough nor did proper prayer

My “good deed book” is given from my right

An angel opened my “book” and read out my plight

Then the angel chided me…

“ O You Muslim servant, you are the one,

Who is given enough time, yet not much is done

Do you know that your faith is loose?

Saying “no time” is only an excuse

Your “good deed book” should be filled up more

With all the good work you stood up for…

Hence, I only recorded those little good deeds

As I say this, I know your eyes will mist…

I was about to write some more, you see

But I did not have, THE TIME to list……

taken from : http://langkah-demi-langkah.blogspot.com/

thanks k anis=)

Why do I Want to Fly?

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim......

Canada...this is where i will be studying by sept 2010 if Allah bless me to go there....amin~
Sounds cool rite??(huhu...riak plak)
But cool, fun, enjoyment are not the only issues.....
The actual issue that i'm pondering is why do i want to fly?

Sky High 2009 that i attended on last Saturday managed to open my eyes to see that there are other important reasons for me to fly rather than just to experience the SNOW which we don't experience in m'sia. It sounds silly...but this was once what i and most of us thought of if we are able to fly.(sort of....)

We want the popularity studying abroad, we want to experience the 4 seasons (winter, summer, fall, spring), we want to see our photos n hari raya greetings published on the newspapers each year....are that the only reasons that make me eager to fly??

Ustaz Hasrizal said :

" Why do you want to fly? why do you prefer studying abroad while m'sia can offer you every courses that you want to do? why?why?

Are you willing to let your parents esp your mom crying for you for years?Do their sacrifices
worth it? "

Let us answer this question together.
After joining this program, these are my answers :

# i want to fly because i want to challege and strengthen my faith to Allah. ustaz said u can't survive with 'islam warisan' but u can survive with 'islam pilihan'.

# i want to fly because i want to grab the opportunities to learn at one of the best uni for geology in canada which is university of toronto (but uni doesn't totally determine our excellance, but our attitude)

# i want to fly because i want to become a mukminah professional, a geologist insyallah who can contribute to the ummah

# i want to prove to myself and the world that islam is the best way of life and muslim can also succeed and i don't want them to look down on us anymore

# i want to fly because i hope by being away from my muslim community that i will appreciate n understand my deen more (because when we study abroad, people will always question our faith)

Ya Allah, if 'flying' is the best for me, make it true Ya Allah....
Give me strength and patience in going through the obstacles on my way there....
if it's not the best for me, make me redha with your faith and continue living as your faithful servant.

Btw, here are some of the pearls that i got while diving in Sky High 2009(hehe...)

# whenever we have problem in life, always go back to basic, Allah our CREATOR then we will find answers and solutions

# where are we from? : alam roh (alam where we are very close to Allah), alam rahim (alam full of love)
why we are here? : to serve Allah ( " I have only created Jinns and men, that they may serve Me " 51:56)
where are going after this? : alam barzakh-alam mahsyar-heaven or hell (our eternal world)

# it is a fitrah for human kind to love being close to Allah since we were close to Him in alam roh, if we choose to go far from Allah we are the ones who are going to suffer and this will never affect Allah.

# excellance is more about our attitude than other factors such as knowledge, skills, and environment

# it's hard to change our attitude, but we can only succeed if we force ourselves to change it, not just giving excuses all the time.
" Verily never will Allah change the condition of people until they change it themselves (with their own souls ) " 13:11

# specially for me, if you want to succeed you need to learn how to control your emotion ( jgn cepat melatah if anything happens)

# be proactive not reactive or inactive
proactive: always try to find the best solution
reactive : never accept his/her mistakes, keep blaming others
easily affected by environment
low ability in controlling him/herself
inactive : no respond

Alhamdulillah....Allah gave me the chance to attend this meaningful program, thank you Ustaz Hasrizal for giving, brothers and sisters for sharing, committees for organising.
May Allah bless you=)

Waallahu'alam~

Abah....sabar ye=)

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim.........

Pg semalam dlm kul 10 cm2.....aq dpt call dr mak.....
terkejut jugak mula2.....coz x pnh lak mak call pg2 cmnie......aq y msh mamai angktla phone2.....(niela akibatnye klu tertdo lps subuh..huhu~)

" Assalamualaikum, mak....npe tepon pg2 nie...ade pape kew? "

" Waalaikumussalam, bru bgon tdow kew? "

" Aah...hehe..."

" erm...mak cume nk bg taw liza....ade org bakar kereta abah "

" Astaghfirullahal azim....btol kew nie mak?spe y bkr? "

" 2la....sian abh kamu...x abis2 org2 nk dengki n die "

Aq terkejut sgt ble dgr berita nie.....terbayang muke abah y bru nek dr sungai.... penat2..tgok2 kereta dah hangus dibakar org....sian abah...sbar ye abh=)
Ini bukan kali pertama org2 ingin mendajal abah....tp abah memang sabar orgnyer....abh selalu ckp cm nie...

" biarlah org nk dengki kt kita, jgn kite lak dengki n org "

Mule2 die tebuk boat abh y diletakkan di tepi sungai....ps2 die pancitkn tayar kereta.....x cukup lg die pecahkn cermin depan kereta abah.....smpi abh drive home tnpa windscreen...nsib baik x hujan mlm2.....tp tndakan org2 kli nie mmg dah melampau....DIE BAKAR KERETA ABAH....kereta y byk berbakti pd kami sekeluarga...kereta y abh bwk ke sungai n ke pasar2 utk berniaga.....smpi hati org2 buat abah cmnie.....

Ya Allah...ampunkanlah org2....hilangkn perasaan dengki die terhadap abah...jgnlah die ape2 kn abh lg selepas nie.....

npe org nie dengki sgt ye??
die x senang ble org len senang...die jeles ble abah selalu dapat byk ikan.....sebab abah mmg pakar bab2 nk tangkap ikan nie....
klu kite x pndi....bertanye...belaja...
bknnyer buat dajal kt org cm2....
lg stu...nk dengki2 buat ape....sungai2 milik Allah....
bukannye die sorang y punye...klu lah aq dpt ckp mcm nie kt org2 kn besh....hehe..(sowy2...emotional plak)

Sian abah....terpakse kumpul duit lg utk beli stu lg kereta....bukan senang taw.....buat mase nie abh gune van y bru di renovate utk ke sungai dan ke pasar....lg pown i2la stu2 nyer transport y kami ade buat mase nie selepas abh accident kreta hri2.....
moto pown ade gak kt umh...alhamdulillah~

Liza bedoa semoga Allah melindungi abah di mana saja die berada.....esp mse d sungai...jgnlah org2 buat ape2 lg....semoga polis dpt tangkap org2 secepat mungkin....walaupown agk sukar kerana tiada bukti nk dakwa org2....tp liza percaya ade hikmah di sebalik semua nie....percaya dgn pasti=)

~Suara seorang anak nelayan~