Thursday, November 12, 2009

How Lucky I am if....


Alhamdulillah, i just finished my usrah after about 2 weeks i missed it.
I feel so much refreshed.
Just now, we discussed about surah Al-Ikhlas which is claimed to be one third of Al-Quran.
Now, only I realize why.
In this surah, lie the fundamentals of our aqidah.

Katakanlah (Muhammad), "Dialah Allah, Yang Maha Esa. Allah tempat meminta segala sesuatu. (Allah) tidak beranak dan tidak pula diperanakkan. Dan tidak ada sesuatu yang setara dengan Dia."

Surah Al-Ikhlas, 112:1-4

From this surah, i realize that actually our tauhid is the most holistic one compared to other religions.
Because our tauhid consists of 3 major things which are synonym to us.
1. Tauhid Ad-Dhamir(we feel that we need God in our life)
2. Tafsir Al-Wujud ( this universe is governed by Allah's system & The Earth is created for humans to be its khalifah, Habluminallah & Habluminannas)
3. Minhajun Hayat ( a way of life which suites our fitrah=Islam)

*any mistakes here, plz correct me yea.jazakillah=)

So, we muslims, if we claim so, should be grateful that we are choosing the best way of life which is Islam.
There are no other religions in this world which can fit these criteria of a holistic way of life.
But then, why we, the so-called muslim choose not to practise Islam entirely in our life
Let's think about it!!!

Just now, i consulted Sis Syahira about my concern on my tarbiyah.
I just feel that i'm lacking of so many things that i need to acquire as a muslimah.
My islamic fikrah(jati diri) is shaking and I'm so worry about that.
I can feel that I can't face this confusing world unless with my firm aqidah and complete understanding of my way of life=Islam.
She told me that the most important thing is mindset.
What am i searching for?
Why am i doing this?
What is my close reference in whatever i do in life?
She concluded that usrah is a way for me to be nutured and educated with Islamic fikrah.
But usrah is not just the sittings that we have every week but it starts when the sitting ends until we meet again the next sitting.
One more thing she stressed on is that we need to put extra effort in order to understand Islam as we do to understand Physics, Chemistry, Furthermaths etc.
We need to do 'homework', 'exercises', 'attend lectures' and etc.
So, why not we do the same to understand Islam, our saviour from hell fire in the future.

Ya Allah, please ease my way in seeking my trueself, seeking You.
I'm so afraid that i will lose this feeling again.
Ya Allah, please protect my heart from jahiliyah and maksiat.
Ya Allah, please make me always remember who am I, I'm Your slave and I got a mission to be accomplished.
Ya Allah, please make my heart sincere, pure and strong in finding You.
Ya Allah, I put all my hopes on You.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Life that I've Wasted


In the name of Allah, My Creator, My Rabb, My Benefactor, The One should I love=)

Praise and syukur to You Ya Allah,
for giving me hopes to continue this life again.
Life that i've wasted before.
Forgive me Ya Allah.

Now, I realize that life can be meaningful.
I'm here with a purpose.
To Obey Allah.
To enjoy life as Allah orders me to do.
Act, I have everything.
Allah who always there for me.
Mak and Abah who always love me.
Ema who always cheers me up.
Nina who always reminds me for my innocence.
Adek who always alert with my changes in life.
Nadhilah who always reminds me about our fitrah, clean from sins.

I have my sahabats who always support me.
thank you for listening to my endless inner conflicts.
thank you for the time that you spent with me.
thank you for brighten up my days since we met.

thank you for your concern.
thank you for your inspirational quotes.
thank you for teaching me the meaning of ukhwah.

jazakillah for everything.
though i just know you.
so sorry if i can't be a good sahabat to you.
thank you for your advices.
thank you for sharing with me the biah.
thank you for accompanying me when i have nobody to turn to.

jazakillah sahabat.
i share a lot with you.
i learn a lot from you too.
" Hati dekat dgn Allah"
" Kekuatan itu dari Allah"
I will always remember that.
sorry for burdening you with my problems.
thank you for listening.
thank you for being there when i need someone to talk to.

aku sayang kau.
though kita dah lame x spend mase sama2.
aku ingat lagi time aku bengong2 kau yang rajin layan cite aku.
ko ckp mmg selamba, tp penuh makna bg aku.
thank you for being my friend.
thank you for everything.

miss u baby.
thank you for being my fren.
"don't dwell hard here. move on. got more chapters to go. colourful ones."
i like it.
love sharing experiences with you.
may Allah bless you always.

thank you for being my sahabat since we 1st came to taylors.
u know a lot bout me.
thank you for your support.
i really appreciate it.

A-Levels frens,
i learn a lot from u guys too.
forgive me for my conducts.
forgive me if i hurt anyone of u.


Sowy for not being a good fren for you.
Sowy for that 'stupid incident'.
I did'nt mean it.
Please forgive me.

Sowy for not being a good fren to you.
Sowy for not trying to understand u guys earlier.
I wish I could.
Please forgive me for that 'stupid incident' too.

Sowy for being judgemental to you.
I know you're a nice girl.
Hope you can find The Truth one day.
Will always pray that Allah will always protects you.
Your words that time taught me a lot of things.
Thank you.
Forgive me yea=)

Thank you for the Pillow Talk that we had.
You cheers me up.
You make me realized that life has more things to offer.
You told me don't think too much, don't be sad, make friends.
"One thing that never changes in life is change itself"
" Kalau gi mana2 new place, cpt2 buat kawan, nti senang, lg pown kt c2 kita bkn ade sape2, kwnla tmpt kite share problems"
I will always remember that.
Thank you dear.

Fiqah baby,
that's wut you always say when you meet me.
nobody did that before.
we share a lot of things.
laugh and tears.
gud luck in ur studies.
u can do it!!!
thank you babe=)

Ya Allah.
Act, my life is not as lonely and empty as I thought.
There are more things it can offer. Colourful ones.
I need to open my heart, see the world with my heart.
So, liza dear,
Let's start again.
It's a new beginning.
Good Luck!!!!

Aku Ingin Melihat Dunia Dengan Mata Hati



Ya Allah.
Aku lemah Ya Allah.
Aku tahu, aku yang pilih untuk berpaling dariMu.
Aku sedar, apa yang aku lakukan selama ini hanya mengikut nafsuku semata.
Aku kesal, aku lebih peduli apa mereka kata, dari apa yang Engkau pinta.

Ya Allah.
Selama ini aku melihat dunia dalam keadaan teraba-raba.
Aku keliru dengan dunia.
Aku turut perasaanku yang lara.
Aku isi kekosongan hidupku dengan sesuatu yang sia-sia lagi hina.

Ya Allah.
Jika inilah suratan takdirMu.
Aku redha.
Ya, kali ini aku redha.

Ya Allah.
Sentuhlah kembali hati ini untuk pulang kepadaMu.
Telah jauh.
Sungguh jauh.
Aku tersasar.
Hampir mati Ya Allah.

Ya Allah.
Beri aku harapan untuk mulakan lagi hidup ini.
Yang telah sekian lama aku rasa tidak beerti.
Aku tak tahu Ya Allah.
Apakah yang aku alami ini.
Cuma apa yang aku rasa ialah kecelaruan diri.
Celaru sangat Ya Allah.

Ya Allah.
Apalah erti keberadaan ku ini.
Ku tak pasti.
Ku amat perlukan bimbingan Ya Allah.
Bimbinglah hamba Ya Allah.
Pujuklah hati hamba Ya Allah.

Ya Allah.
Tiba-tiba, aku rasa hidup ini tiada erti.
Tiada apa yang bisa mengisi kekosongan hati ini.
Puas aku mencari.
Hingga aku terhenyak ke lembah hina.
Tapi, Kau masih sayang padaku Ya Allah.

Ya Allah.
Aku ingin melihat dunia dengan mata hati.
Merasa hidup berTuhankanMu Ya Allah.

Ya Allah.
Ajarku cara menjadi hambaMu.
Ajarku cara melaksanakan tanggungjawabku kepadaMu.
Ajarku cara untuk mencintaiMu dalam seluruh nafasku.

Ya Allah.
Aku ingin kembali.
Aku ingin berubah.
Aku sangat butuhkan keampunanMu.

Terimalah taubatku Ya Allah.
Pelihara hatiku yang liar ini.
Agar sentiasa mengingatiMu.
MendahulukanMu dalam segala urusan.

Ya Allah.
Aku ingin melihat dunia dengan mata hati.
Kerana hanya dengan itu kutemui ketenangan.
Hanya dengan mengingatiMu hatiku tenang.

Ya Allah.
Aku rindu Kamu=)

Monday, November 9, 2009

Where's My U-turn???


Ya Allah.
I don't know why i'm feeling this way these last years.
I feel my life is empty.
No urge to move on in life.
I feel so hopeless.
It's so much different now.
Never thought of it before.

Free time is killing me.
Loneliness is making it even worst.
I need somebody to talk to.
To share my feelings and thoughts.
Yes, tarbiyah opens my eyes to a brighter side of life.
But, it takes time for me to digest that.
Even to make it works for me.

Ya Allah.
Thank you for all these tests.
But, my Rabb,
I just can't take it anymore.
Please guide me.
I did so many things wrongly.
Honestly, i feel so sad right now.
Feel like running away.
To find peace.
To find You.
This world is confusing me.

Ya Allah.
Change the way i see life.
Change the way i understand the purpose of me being here.
Let me see it from The Window of Islam.
Though people see it from many windows.
Broken windows.
Dusty windows.
Opaque windows.

Ya Allah.
Make me strong.
Make me not easily affected by what people say about me.
Make me patient in finding You.
Coz so far i haven't found You.
It's a long road.
Guide me Ya Allah.
Don't let me astray from this road.

Monday, November 2, 2009

Years of Loneliness


ups and downs in life.
they are always there.
that's life.
falling again?
never mind=)
don't stop climbing.
continue dear.
with bigger hopes.
and this time be more alert.
watch out for any trap.
don't fall to it again.


Am i fated to be a lone ranger?
I always feel lonely.
Like stranded in an isolated island.
My heart is empty.
For so many years.
I tried to fill it with a man's love before.
I'm not happy though.

Then studying in this college making me lonely evenmore.
No friends' shoulder to cry on.
I can't stand this actually.
All the time, i'm the one who need to understand and please them.
But they never understand me.
You hurt me girls!!!

I'm an emotional person.
I see the world with my heart.
I think with my heart.
I decide everything with my heart.
That's where i always get trapped.
Trapped by my own heart.
Unguided heart.

I think Allah wants to teach me something.
That i should'nt bother to win people's love but win His love first.
His love is enough for me.
And you will never feel lonely.

Sometimes, i feel that life is nothing.
Life is full with injustice.
People themselves create this.
You can see it everywhere in this world.
People are going against their fitrah.
I think everybody feels this, but nobody shouts it out.
They just follow the flow.

Only Islam can save us.
From all this miseries.
From all this loneliness.
From all this emptiness of life.

I know it.
But I always get confused by the world.
I can't really see the beauty of Islam.
It's ' tenggelam dan timbul'.
The biah is not there.
So, should i go to somewhere that i can find the biah?
Or should i create the biah?
Can I do it??

It's all about removing all the stains of jahiliyah in myself.
I hate this world.
I feel like going to somewhere where i can find peace.
To treat my heart.
My heart hurts.
It's shouting to be filled with something.
and I haven't found it yet.

Should i wait???


Thursday, October 29, 2009



Praise and gratitude to Allah who never forget all His slaves though they always forget Him.
Though they know that only by remembering Him that we will find peace.
So, let us pause for a while=)
(beriman sejenak!!!)
Think of Allah.
Think of His gifts.
Think that all that we have are all from Him.
Actually, nothing is ours.
So, let say alhamdulillah=)
thank you=)


“Inform me about Ihsan.” He (the Messenger of Allah) answered, ” It is that you should serve Allah as though you could see Him, for though you cannot see Him yet He sees you.”

part of Hadis 2
reported by Muslim=)

Have you heard about IHSAN?
Do you know what does it mean?

For me,
IHSAN is something that i almost doesn't have it in myself.
My life before, tell me this.
That's why failures surrounded me.
That's why the non-muslims outshine me.
That's why Allah keeps giving me the same tests.
Now i know,
Allah wants to teach me about IHSAN which you will realize its significance when you understand IMAN and ISLAM with your heart not only your mind.
Alhamdulillah, at least i know my weakness.

In every single thing that we do in life, Allah wants us to do it with IHSAN.
To do something with IHSAN means, we do it our best.
We do it as we see Allah in front of us.
If we can't do this, always remember that Allah is watching us all the time.
Not even a single second that He miss.

So, what's my point??

Don't you think that by applying IHSAN in his/her life, a muslim should become a great and extraordinary person?

But most muslims don't realize this especially me.
What a waste right??


Sigh should come with improvements!!!!
Self-check is good but it is useless if nothing is done to correct our mistakes!!!!

So, brothers and sisters,
Let's change=)
Let's practise IHSAN in our life!!!!


It's simple but not easy=)

From now on,
in anything that we do, let's do it our best.
No more playing the fool.
No more 'cincai-cincai' work.
No more 'malas-malas'.
Because we are MUSLIMS!!!
and MUSLIMS should be great!!!

and REMEMBER!!!!
Allah is watching us!!!
Are we doing our job?
Remember 'OUR JOB' ???

hint : 51:56

Last but not least,


Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Erti Sebuah M.U.J.A.H.A.D.A.H.


Teringat petikan dari post sahabat saya di blognya,

" JAHILIYAH & ISLAM tidak boleh ada serentak dalam jiwamu "
" pilih SATU!!! "

" x boleh ek? " (nie saya tambah..hehe)

I made up my mind already.
I choose ISLAM.
You expect it right?
Not because i'm good, but each and everyone of us wants to do so one day.
When is your day, brothers and sisters??

Making decision is not easy.
But, to stick with your decision persistently and single-mindedly is even tougher.
ilmu=uderstanding, mujahadah=sacrifice, istiqamah=consistency, doa=prayer are all that you need=)

But, in the bitterness of mujahadah, sometimes, i can feel the sweetness of it.
Though, most of the time what i feel is just it's bitterness.
I believe that one day i can taste the sweetness of iman=)

Now, before i do something, i really need to think first, whether Allah approves it or not.
This is what we call, "BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND" which i hardly practised before.
If yes, lucky me=)
If no, there will be conflicts in me.
Whether to follow my own desire or Allah's.
I have to put Allah 1st, then only others.

Ya Allah,
grant me Your love,
make me love those things which can win Your heart,
please and please fill my heart with Your love only,
so that i'm not longing for somebody else to fill my heart.
and I know loving You will not fade my love to my parents, siblings, sahabats, murabbi, friends and others.
Your love will make me love others even more.

Mujahadah is a fight!!!
Mujahadah is like having a war in your innerself.
Supposedly, IMAN should WIN and NAFS & EVILS should LOST.
So, the choice is in our hands!!!

" You cannot take MEDICINE and POISONS at the same time "
" You will DIE man!!!! "

simple phrase, but it tells everything about mujahadah.
Yeaa, you cannot take MEDICINE (Allah's orders) and POISONS ( nafs' and evils' orders) at the same time!!!!
Always keep that in mind liza!!!
You too, brothers and sisters.

May Allah give us strength to continue this FIGHT persistenly.

p/s: to all sahabats, brothers and sisters who are struggling in the M.U.J.A.H.A.D.A.H. WAR.
gud luck=)
Allah will always look and reward our efforts.insyAllah~
" moga tetap hati, tak berbelah bagi "
salam ukwah fillah=P


Friday, October 23, 2009

The Return=)


In the name of Allah The Most Gracious and The Most Merciful.
Thank you Allah. Thank you Allah. Thank you Allah.


Rain begins to stop.
The Sun is smiling to me=P
Rainbow gives me hope.
Yesterday's thunderstorms have stopped.
Alhamdulillah and Astaghfirullah that's all i can say=)

Ya Allah,
You love me so much.
How dare i just neglected You like that!!!!
I entered that DARK ROOM, though You called and stopped me for so many times.

Ya Allah,
There's nothing in that DARK ROOM.
You are wright.
How dare i did'nt believe You!!!

Forgive me Ya Allah.
I know I'm totally wrong.
I know it was a way for You to tell me this.
Thank you Allah.
I really appreciate it.
May be to this extend only i realize that You are always there.
You are always here for me.
You are here to forgive me.

Ya Allah,
Please and please accept MY RETURN.
I have no where to go=(
Please accept me Ya Allah=(
and I believe that You will=)


Dari Anas radiyallahu 'anh katanya:
Aku dengar Rasulullah S.A.W. bersabda:

Diriwayatkan oleh al-Tirmizi.
Hadis ke-42~


Katakanlah, " Wahai hamba-hambaKu yang melampaui batas terhadap diri sendiri! Janganlah kamu berputus asa dari rahmat Allah. Sesungguhnya Allah mengampuni dosa-dosa semuanya. Sungguh, Dialah Yang Maha Pengampun, Maha Penyayang".

Dan kembalilah kamu kepada Tuhanmu, dan berserah dirilah kepadaNya sebelum datang azab kepadamu, kemudian kamu tidak dapat ditolong.

Dan ikutilah sebaik-baik apa yang telah diturunkan kepadamu (Al-Quran) dari Tuhanmu sebelum datang azab kepadamu secara mendadak, sedang kamu tidak menyedarinya.

agar jangan ada orang yang mengatakan, " Alangkah besar penyesalanku atas kelalaianku dalam (menunaikan kewajipan) terhadap Allah, dan sesungguhnya aku termasuk orang-orang yang memperolok-olokkan (agama Allah) ".

atau (agar jangan) ada yang berkata, " Sekiranya Allah memberi petunjuk kepadaku tentulah aku termasuk orang-orang yang bertakwa."

atau (agar jangan) ada yang berkata ketika melihat azab, " Sekiranya aku dapat kembali (ke dunia), tentu aku termasuk orang-orang yang berbuat baik."

Sungguh, " sebenarnya keterangan-keteranganKu telah datang kepadamu, tetapi kamu mendustakannya, malah kamu menyombongkan diri dan termasuk orang kafir."

Az-Zumar, 39: 53-59

Ya Allah,
sungguh indah caraMu memujukku.
sungguh tepat caraMu mengingatkanku tentang azabMu.

" ikutilah sebaik-baik apa yang diturunkan kepadamu (Al-Quran)"

InsyAllah, aku akan cuba.
Cuba sedaya upaya.
Beri aku kekuatan ya Allah.

In the name of Allah,
The Return begins~

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Ini Kisah Kawan Saya=(


Dengan nama Allah Yang Maha Pemurah Lagi Maha Penyayang.
Alhamdulillah, kerana aku masih di sini.
Masih bernafas dengan 'oksigen' Mu.
Takkan ku hirup 'carbon dioxide' itu lagi.
Dadaku sesak olehnya.
Rasa mahu mati.


Aku sangka dia sama seperti akhawat yang lain.
Tidak mempunyai kisah hitam sepertiku.
Rupa-rupanya dia juga punya kisah.
Jauh lebih hitam. Kelam.


Segalanya bermula selepas SPM.
Kawanku yang berasal dari sekolah berasrama penuh ini tercari-cari siapa dirinya.
Tidak mahu lagi menjadi seorang gadis 17 tahun yang selalu dianggap alim dan sukar didekati oleh lelaki.
Seumur hidupnya, tidak pernah ada lelaki yang meluahkan rasa cinta kepadanya.
Tidak seperti kawan-kawannya yang lain.
Mesti ada punyalah.
Sedikit demi sedikit dia semakin kurang percaya diri.
Tak adakah lelaki yang ingin kepadaku?Buruk sangatkah aku?
Baginya lelaki ni, kalau mahu cari pasangan mesti yang cantik.
Tak cantikkah dia?
Aku rasa dia manis orangnyer.

Dia juga perempuan biasa. Punya keinginan. Mencintai dan dicintai oleh insan yang bernama lelaki.
Tiba-tiba, lelaki menjadi isu besar dalam hidupnya.
Tanpa dia sedar.
Dia turutkan sahaja.
Dia begitu obses untuk menjadi cantik.
Baginya, bila dia cantik, mesti ada lelaki yang mahukan dia.

Dari seorang yang berpakaian simple dan menutup aurat, dia menjadi lebih bergaya.
Jeans mula dibelinya. Baju semakin ketat. Make-up pown mula ditempelnya ke muka.
Cermin mata kini tiada lagi. Maklumlah, pakai 'contact lens' kan lebih cantik.
Ya, memang dia cantik sekarang.
Tapi, bagiku dulu dia lebih cantik.
Cantik dengan akhlaknya.
Kawanku ini pemalu orangnye, kalau nak bercakap dengan lelaki, usah mimpi la.
Sopan dan manis .
Kawan, aku rindu kamu yang dulu=(

3 bulan selepas SPM,
dia berkenalan dengan seorang lelaki.
Dari MySpace katanya.
Perkenalan yang simple dan 'famous' masa kini.
Dari sembang di internet, mereka berkenalan di telefon.
Kemudian jumpa. Kemudian 'couple'.
Kemudian dia ditinggalkan.
Dia 'frust' sangat2.
Dia sudah lakukan segalanya untuk dapat cinta lelaki itu.
Termasuk menyerahkan kesuciannya.
Ya Allah, macam mana boleh jadi begini.
Maafkan kawanku ini ya Allah.

Kini dia amat2 menyesal.
Aku tahu itu kerana kini dia sedang menangis di hadapanku.
Kawanku, seandainya aku dapat memujukmu.
Aku faham apa yang kau alami.
Tapi, kita sebagai perempuan tidak boleh terus bodoh begitu.
Itukan kisah lamamu.
Jangan risau sayang, kisah silam itu takkan menghalangmu berlari di jalan ini.
Teruskan berlari sayang.
Kalau kau jatuh aku ada di sisi untuk bantu kau bangun.
Kami sama2 menangis.

Ramai yang masih x percaya dan yakin dengan pasti, yang jodoh ini di Tangan Allah.
Ramai yang kata percaya, tapi dalam hati tidak.

Ramai juga yang tidak percaya, bahawa LELAKI YANG BAIK UNTUK PEREMPUAN YANG BAIK.
Tidak sabar mungkin.
Justeru, mereka jadi gelisah.
Gelisah mencari.
Gelisah mengubah diri menjadi seperti yang diidamkan atau diterima pasangan.
Aku semakin lemas dengan isu ini.

Ya Allah, berikanlah CINTAMU kepadaku,
Jadikanlah orang yang MENCINTAIMU mencintai aku, dan jadikanlah aku mencintai segala sesuatu yang membawa kepada KECINTAANMU.

Aku tenang lepas baca doa ini=)

Pembaca sekalian, kisah kawan saya ini bukan kisah terpencil.
Kisah ini banyak berlaku.
Dan terus berlaku.
Kalau anda punya kawan sebegini, beri dia 'support'.
Sedarkan dia.
Apa yang dia fikir itu cuma andaian semata.
Hidup ini bukan saja pasal lelaki.
Bak kata sahabat saya, there are a lot more chapters to go.
colourful ones=)
So, be happy k.
And happiness is always there with things approved by Allah.
Not, in things that Allah forbids.
Get me??


Tuesday, September 15, 2009

yeAy!!! RaYA DAtaNg LAgi:D


Time flies so fast.

Hari Raya is coming soon.

May Allah gives us the chance to feel it once again this year.

This is my 19th Hari Raya.

This year, I don't want it to be like my previous ones.

I want to celebrate it meaningfully this year, not meaninglessly as before.

Now I realized that Hari Raya is not just about DUIT RAYA, BAJU RAYA, KUIH RAYA & PERABOT RAYA.

It has more to give us. Not just the fun but the values too.


It is celebrated every year. But, do we know why we are celebrating it?


What does it have to do with fitrah?
Lol, what does it mean?

It means....

We are celebrating it for our success in returning ourselves to our fitrah.


Yes, fitrah. Our pure fitrah.

Even more confused, lol.

Wait, i'll explain more.

Do you know that Allah created us with fitrah?

To love Allah is a fitrah.
To obey Allah is a fitrah.
To love good deeds is a fitrah.

To love other things more than Allah is not a fitrah.
To disobey Allah is not a fitrah.
To do what Allah forbids is not a fitrah.
To take Allah's gift for granted without syukur is not a fitrah.

So, what??
Ramadhan that we've been going through for 30 days is a training provided by Allah to return us to our fitrah.
Don't you realize that we are far away from it now?
So many things that we did which go against our own fitrah.
For Allah so loves us, He gives us Ramadhan to purify ourselves.
Nikmat mana lg yang mahu kau dustakan??

Ramadhan purifies us? How's that?

Yea la. For one month, we fast from dawn till sunset by not eating and drinking and abstaining ourselves from doing things that can make our fast invalid or reduce its bless.

Hunger during the day teaches us to appreciate food more.

If before this we live to eat, then we learn that actually we eat to live.

Here, Islam is teaching us to eat what we need not what we want.

From hunger, we know how do the poor people feel when they have nothing to eat for the whole day.

Hunger is a good thing too.

A wise man once said, " jika laparlah perutmu, maka kenyanglah akalmu, hatimu, tanganmu, kakimu dan seluruh anggotamu ".
It means that hunger can initiate progress for our brain, purify our heart and abstain us from doing bad things or it simply means it trains our nafs to follow Allah's rule.
I know you might say hunger can make people do crime like stealing for food.

Here, we, muslims are different.
We stand hunger in Ramadhan for Allah's sake.

And we are not fasting because there is no food to eat, but it's because Allah tells us to do so.

How powerful is that, when you have food to eat, but you choose not to because of Allah.

So, we muslims should use this same skill to abstain ourselves from what Allah forbids us to do.

We choose to cover our aurat when others uncover their's.
We choose to pray 5 times a day when others don't.
We choose to be firm with our Islamic Identity/Fikrah while others don't for whatsoever reasons.
We choose not to go for prompt, party and clubbing though people think we are outdated.

Brothers and sisters, here Ramadhan is teaching us that:

Hope all of us can accept this=)

Then, Ramadhan purifies us through the ibadah that we do throughout this month.

For every ibadah that we do, Allah promises us with great rewards and forgiveness.

-train us to wake up early in the morning while other people are still snoring on their bed
-give us innerpeace through communication with Allah, here we tell Allah what we feel, the problem that we have and the sins that we commit.
-make us realize that Allah is always there for us, we just need to pray to Him and put all our hopes on Him.
-i start to love it=)

-i just realized how wonderful is our Quran, it is a love letter from Allah, Allah is talking to you & me
-give me innerpeace too and always consult me when i'm down
-guide me on how should i lead my life since i always get confused by this world
-from now on, we should make this Quran our best friend and teacher

-for me personally it teaches me to watch on my time so that it is spent for doing things which have value for Allah
-because normally after maghrib prayer, i used to 'lepak' and end up doing nothing
-teach me the value of patience in doing ibadah

-now i agree that only by remembering Allah that we find peace
-when we always remember Allah and always put Allah first, there is less chance for us to commit sins
-don believe me?try it k=)

Brothers and sisters,
this is basically how Ramadhan purifies us and return us to our fitrah which is LOVE TO BE CLOSE TO ALLAH AND LOVE TO OBEY ALLAH.
May the effects of Ramadhan stay in us throughout the year until we meet it again next year.
Let us celebrate Hari Raya with full of syukur to Allah and don't ruin it by doing nonsense.
Feel it with your hearts, how nice, how peace, how pure for us to return to our FITRAH.

SeLaMat HarI RayA,

Maaf Zahir & Batin.


Thursday, September 10, 2009



Alhamdulillah, AS Trial is over.
But, I'm not satisfied with it. My effort, i mean.
I can feel that I'm not going to score this time too.
It's ok. No use if i were to regret now.
Be serious liza. This is about your future.
This is your last chance to prove your capabilities.
I know you are trying hard, but you just not done enough.
Work harder & smarter.

Plus, it's just 3 subjects for you to sit.
Maths, Physics, & Chemistry.
You can do it. Believe me=)
You just need to focus on them. Love them.
Ilmu Allah, never finish to be learned but learning them will make us know Him more.

No more wasting time.
You have a mission!!!
A very important one.
Don't you??

Holidays just started.
It's about 2 weeks.
12-27 of September.
But for me it's not even 2 weeks.
Some more, I need to come back 2 days earlier 4 SAT classes.
No more weekends after this.
Ermm, it's ok dear. For your own good:D

I'm praying hard that I can use these holidays to the max.
Need study plan. Should get one=)
Must finish revision for the 3 subjects.
Must do past years.
InsyAllah, I'll try my best.
Ya Allah, permudahkan segala urusanku.
Tetapkan hatiku dgn awlawiyatku=)

Liza, dear.
Exam2 jugak.
But, don't forget, Ramadhan is leaving us soon!!!
Continue in searching Allah's forgiveness & bless.
Pray to Him. He knows you best. He always gives you the best.
Know who you are to Him. You are His slave. Full time slave.
May this Ramadhan be the turning point of my life.
I'm working to be a true muslimah.


Friday, September 4, 2009

My dear SISTERS, let join us=)


Alhamdulillah, now we reach the middle of Ramadhan and soon it will leave us.

Well done, to all of you who had fill the 1st half of Ramadhan with ibadah and self-improvements. May Allah bless all of you. Ameen~

Now, we have about 16 days to go!!!

Let us use this remaining days to do more ibadah which will bring us closer to Allah and make us a better muslim. It's never too late, brothers and sisters=)

To all my dearest SISTERS in Taylors',

We have something for you=)
Not just a normal iftar.
We have games & sharing sessions too!!!
Come & join us.
You will feel the difference.hehe=P
p/s: it's free and transport will be provided. so, don't worry k=)
any inquiries plz contact us.

I'll Always be a Learner=)


Alhamdulillah. Praise to Allah The Most Merciful.
All the sorrow that i know melted away. Then a heroin in me comes along with the strength to carry on. InsyAllah=)

Now, I'm walking to a NEW WORLD. As a NEW COMER , I should be humble (know who am I) and willing to learn from others. I should take this opportunity to learn the skills needed to live in this NEW WORLD. I think I have the spirit and ideas but they have the knowledge and experience. So, why not we help each other instead of pointing out others' weaknesses.
Be patient, dear. It's normal. Don't let the differences between us divides us, but let it makes us unique. Differences are there to give us the colours of this NEW WORLD.

" i'm a NEW COMER. forget me plz for my conducts. plz correct me if i'm wrong. i just get 2 know all these things, so kind of excited. i'm willing to learn from you all. i'll always be a learner. insyAllah. "


Now, I'm getting myself clearer of the PURPOSE OF MY LIFE.
Alhamdulillah, now, all the jahilliyah thoughts hardly come and I'm able to get rid most of the useless fears and worries in me.
I'm no longer mourning and regretting my past.
I'm a new person. Though it's hard for me to change these parts of me.
I'm trying to be realistic.
I question less and listen more.
I do question more but for necessary things only.


My dreams are sky high.
I know it's possible.
It's a choice.
Choose to be or not to be.
Allah will never change the fate of a person, until the person herself makes efforts to change it.


Make ISLAM stands in YOU, then only YOU stands for ISLAM.
Don't take the MUSLIM title for granted.
There must be reasons why Allah loves MUSLIM so much not the KUFR.
Do you deserve that love??


Saturday, August 8, 2009

Bila CINTA Di ' MONYET ' kn oleh kita


Segala puji bg Allah Tuhan Seluruh Alam.

CINTA? Apakah yang terlintas dalam fikiran kita bila ditanyakan tentang CINTA?
Kenapa semua orang suka bercakap soal CINTA? Kenapa ada yang senyum sorang2 bila ditanya soal CINTA? Kenapa CINTA menjadi isu 'evergreen' dr dlu hingga sekarang? Ada apa dengan CINTA?

Sejujur-jujurnya, saya sendiri pun sangat suka bercakap soal CINTA, ingin berCINTA dan pernah berCINTA.
Adakah salah untuk mempunyai rasa CINTA?
Adakah salah jika menCINTAI sesuatu?
Begitu kejamkah ISLAM hingga kita tidak boleh berCINTA?
Jom, kawan2 kita cari jawapannya sama2=)

Sebelum itu, apa itu CINTA bagi kita? Saya nak kita semua jawab dengan jujur dari hati ye, tak nak jawapan yang skema2.
CINTA is a very subjective feeling. It depends on HOW we DEFINE 'CINTA' .
Ada orang kata, CINTA=cinta seorang lelaki kepada seorang perempuan & vice versa
Ada juga orang kata , CINTA=cinta pada kepuasaan, kejayaan, kekayaan (fly, high-paid career,wealth)
Ada juga sebilangan kecil yang kata, CINTA=cinta kepada Allah Sang Pencipta CINTA
(walaupun dianggap pelik bagi sesetengah pihak).

Apapun definisi CINTA bg kita, yang penting, CINTA itu FITRAH manusia. CINTA itu bisa membius pencintanya. CINTA itu menyebabkan pencintanya resah bila tidak bertemu dan suka bila disuruh. CINTA itu membuatkan kita BAHAGIA walaupun di mata orang kita sengsara. Begitu hebat CINTA ni ye=)

Ok. Enough of ayt bunga2.
Jadi, sekarang saya nk ajak diri saya sendiri dan kawan2 semua fikir luas sikit pasal CINTA ni.
Takdela bila disebut CINTA aje, kita terbayangkan " if i were in love with that guy, if i were married to that guy, or beshnyer memori couple kita ".

Kawan2, pernah tak kita terpikir kenapa Allah beri kita perasaan CINTA?
Jawapannya kerana CINTA itu HEBAT.
Kenapa HEBAT?
Sebab, secara FITRAHnya, bila kita CINTAkan sesuatu, kita sanggup berkorban dan melakukan apa sahaja demi CINTA kita.
Sebab, CINTA bisa membuatkan kita bersabar dan bahagia biarpun pelbagai dugaan perlu ditempuh.

Since, CINTA ini sangat HEBAT, soalnya, kepada siapa CINTA ini harus kita CURAHkn?
1. KEKASIH, yang belum tentu menjadi suami atau isteri kita or SUAMI/ISTERI, yg halal dicintai dan dirindui
2. STUDY, yang menyebabkan kita tidak berfikir mengenaI hal lain, yang difikirkan hanyalah nak fly, nk fly n nk fly=)
3. KAWAN2, yang belum tentu bersama kita senang dan susah
4. IBUBAPA, yang menyayangi kita dari kita sebesar botol hinggalah sebesar sekarang
5. RASULULLAH, yang bila sedang menghadapi sakaratul maut, masih mnyebut 'ummati, ummati, ummati=umatku, umatku, umatku'
6. ALLAH, yang jika nak dihitung nikmatnya, pasti tidak akan terhitung oleh kita

Kawan2, anda jawab sendiri!!!

Kawan2, saya nak anda semua tahu, saya menulis ni, bukan untuk memaksa kawan-kawan ubah definisi CINTA anda.
Saya sendiri pown sedang cuba digest perkara ini. Jadi apa salahnya kita digest sama2 kn?TQ=)

Anda perasan tak sekarang manusia sudah tidak menghargai perasaan CINTA yang Allah beri?
Anda setuju tak kalau saya cakap manusia kini sudah me'MONYET'kn CINTA mereka?
Mereka senang-senang je bagi CINTA dekat org yang tak sepatutnya.
Mereka berCINTA sakan sampai lupe siapa DIRI, lupe PARENTS, lupe STUDY, dan lebih teruk lupe ALLAH.
Kawan2, ini bukan tujuan Allah beri kita rasa CINTA.

Jadi tak boleh berCINTA?
Kene campak jauh2 rasa CINTA ni?
Mana bolehh!!!!

Tidak sama sekali. Allah tak sekejam itu.
Bila CINTA kepada berlainan jantina itu datang, anda perlu hargainya kerana itu membuktikan anda normal.
Simpan perasaan itu dalam hati dan jangan pernah luahkan kepada si dia.
Kerana, ini belum masanya untuk anda lestarikan CINTA itu.
Kenapa plak?
Kerana anda belum ada kapasiti.
Maksud kapasiti di sini ialah apa yang anda boleh buat sekarang jika CINTA anda itu dilestarikan sekarang.
Anda masih study, dia masih study, dua2 pown sponsors n makbapak yang tanggung.Betul x?
Jadi, jika anda berCINTA sakan sekarang, anda pastikah yang anda akan kahwin dengan dia?

Ok. But coupling is now a trend. I don't want to be left out.
For me, it's ok to be left out, coz coupling is not worth it.

Ok. But he/she inspires me to excel in my study?
It's simple. Sudah tidak adakah sumber inspirasi lain di dunia ini.
Allah, parents.Anyone??

Ok. But i really want to marry him/her.
If so, good. But don't ruin him/her by coupling but nikahilah dia when u r ready.

Before i end, i leave you guys with something to ponder=)





Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Where's the HEROIN in ME??


Long time never write here. Taking my own sweet time to digest new things that I get.
Until one day, my sahabat asked me to express anything that i feel here.
She said, do not wait until you understand it as a whole.
Just express it here, maybe others can help you to digest it better=)

Now, I feel so uncertain. I don't know why, but i know there's something wrong over 'here'.
Sometimes, i feel like starting a new life but sometimes, 'it' hold me back.
I still remember what my sisters and sahabats keep telling me over n over again.
In life, there are only 3 days:

# YESTERDAY : u can do nothing to change it
# TODAY : most important ( use it to the max )
# TOMORROW : let it to Allah coz we don't know we'll be there or not but doesn't mean that u can't plan 4 it.

To be honest, now i feel like i am somebody else. Not the brave and strong LIZA anymore.
So many things happened these last two years which lower down my self-confidence.
I got dreams. Sometimes, they seem so far away from me.
I feel like running away from people and most of the time from problems.
I know all these TESTS should make me stronger coz Allah Himself is testing me.
I remember what K. Shira told me:

" In life, there are so many turning points. This is one of your turning points."
" Liza wake up, step up and move on "

I miss the old LIZA who used to be confidence in herself.
I miss the old LIZA who used to be the best among the best.
I miss the old LIZA who knew what she's doing.
I miss the old LIZA who had passion towards her study.

I know the old liza did not know the purpose of her creation.
I know the old liza was so innocent about TRUE LOVE.
I know the old liza talk more than work.

Ya Allah, give me faith in You.
Ya Allah, make me stay in ISLAM.
Ya Allah, teach me to become a true MUSLIM.
Ya Allah, give me sahabats who will b with me in this path.

Good to listen=)

Theres a hero
If you look inside your heart
You dont have to be afraid
Of what you are
Theres an answer
If you reach into your soul
And the sorrow that you know
Will melt away
And then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive
So when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
And you'll finally see the truth
That a hero lies in you
Its a long road
When you face the world alone
No one reaches out a hand
For you to hold
You can find LOVE
If you search within yourself
And the emptiness you felt
Will disappear
And then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive
So when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
and you'll finally see the truth
That a hero lies in you
Lord knows
Dreams are hard to follow
But dont let anyone tear them away
Hold on
There will be tomorrow
In time
You'll find the way
And then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive
So when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
and you'll finally see the truth
That a hero lies in you
That a hero lies in you
That a hero lies in

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Mengapa aku masih mencintai dia???


Ada seorang perempuan yang baru sahaja mahu mengenal TuhanNya yang selama ini dia sering lupakan. Perempuan ini baru sahaja menyedari tujuan hidupnya yang sebenar, sudah faham dan masih berusaha untuk faham dgn betul2 tujuan hidupnya.

Dalam dia gigih berusaha untuk mencari CINTA Tuhannya, cinta lamanya masih mekar bersemi. Bersemi untuk seorang lelaki yang tidak mungkin faham apa yang dia faham sekarang. Lebih malang lagi, lelaki itu bukan seorang muslim yang taat kpd Allah dan dapat membimbing dirinya untuk terus dalam jalan tarbiyah ini.( lelaki itu tidak tahu solat, pernah berzina, telah berapa kali bercouple dan merokok secara aktif).
Pendek kata, tidak ada ciri2 lelaki budiman idaman seorang muslimah pada dirinya. Cuma, lelaki itu pernah memberitahunya bahawa dia ingin berubah. Tapi, selepas dia berkahwin dengan perempuan itu nanti. Dan ini jugalah sebab utama perempuan ini berkenalan dengan lelaki itu pada mulanya. Untuk membimbing dia ke jalan Allah. Tapi lain pula jadinya, cinta nafsu lebih kuat dari niat murni mereka.

Kini, dalam keadaan dirinya baru melangkah dalam dunia tarbiyah, persoalan2 ini meracun hatinya, meragut lenanya pada malam hari.
Perempuan ini selalu bertanya pada dirinya sendiri,
" Mengapa walau dia seteruk itu, aku masih mencintainya? Masih cinta walaupun sudah berada dalam tarbiyah. Adakah sebab dia cinta pertamaku?"

Lalu dia pun terfikir apakah yang boleh dia harapkan daripada cintanya ini.
" Mungkinkah satu hari nanti dia akan mendapat hidayah dari Allah, lalu aku dapat bahagia bersamanya? "
" Dapatkah aku yang masih bertatih ini membantunya kembali ke jalan Allah?Atau mungkin aku yang akan tergelincir sama? Ya Allah, aku buntu."
" Haruskah aku tinggalkan dia, sedang aku tahu dia sedang berlumuran dosa?Patutkah aku pergi jauh darinya untuk mnyelamatkan diriku dan memantapkan imanku dahulu? Ya Allah aku tak tahu."

Lelaki itu benar-benar serius mencintainya dan ingin berkahwin dengannya. Perempuan itu juga.
" Tetapi cukupkah cinta sahaja sebagai sandaran perkahwinan mereka? "
" Bolehkah perempuan itu terus kekal dalam tarbiyah selepas kahwin nanti, atau suaminya akan menjadi penghalang kepada niatnya? "
" Realistikkah seorang isteri untuk membimbing suaminya? Adakah suaminya benar-benar mahu berubah selepas berkahwin? "

Tambahan pula, keluarga perempuan itu tidak merestui perhubungan mereka.
Kerana lelaki itu hanya bekerja sebagai 'aircond' man dan pelajarannya hanya tahap sijil. Perempuan itu pula bakal mengambil ijazah di luar negara. Pelik bukan. Bagaimana mereka boleh jatuh cinta. Perempuan itu juga berasa pelik. Tapi jujur, dia tidak tahu kenapa dan bagaimana ini terjadi pada dirinya.

Mereka pernah bercouple dan baru sahaja putus kerana terpaksa. Kini, mereka hanya kawan dan masih berhubungan melalui sms dan phone call. Tapi hanya sebagi kawan. Tapi mereka masih saling mencintai. Dalam masa berkawan dgn lelaki itu selepas break, perempuan itu merasa dia tidak dapat menganggap lelaki itu sebagai kawan. Sayang dan cemburu masih beraja di hati.

" Apa yang patut aku buat sekarang? Tinggalkan dia buat selama-lamanya? Bagaimana harus aku terangkan padanya? Aku telah banyak kali suruh dia jangan contact aku, tapi aku yang contact dia semula. Kini aku malu untuk cakap padanya yang aku mahu stop semua ini secara total. Ya Allah, bantulah aku membuat keputusan dan tindakan~ "

p/s : Kepada anda semua, harap dapat drop comment mengenai kisah ini. Semoga kita sama2 dapat berkongsi cara penyelesaiannya. Thanks=)

Monday, May 25, 2009



Kehidupan di Taylors College dan Casa Subang telah banyak mengajar aku erti hidup.
Sekarang aku sedar siapa aku, tiada apa yang perlu dibangga-banggakan. Banyak lagi kawan-kawanku di sini yang hebat-hebat dan menjadi sumber inspirasiku.
Bak kata cerdik pandai, " di atas satu langit, ada langit yang lain ".
Aku sedar aku perlu berubah dan belajar.
Aku perlu belajar merangkang dahulu, bertatih dan berjalan, kemudian baru berlari.
Mana mungkin aku hendak terus bisa berlari. Kerana sudah sunnatullah begitu. Semuanya berperingkat-peringkat=)

Banyak yang perlu diperbaiki, dipelajari, difahami dan diamati.
Apa yang nak dimalukan, setiap yang hebat bermula dari bawah juga.
Ya Allah, bagiku kekuatan untuk memerangi diriku sendiri.
Terlalu banyak yang perlu disucikan dari jiwa ini.
Cabaran yang terbesarku kini ialah HAWA NAFSUku sendiri.
Ia masih belum MAHU TUNDUK pada SYARIATMU.

Terbaca satu artikel yang sesuai dengan diri waktu ini.
Diselitkan ayat Allah yang berbunyi begini.

" Dan orang-orang yang berjihad untuk ( mencari keredhaan Kami ) benar-benar Kami akan menunjukkan kepada mereka jalan-jalan Kami. " (29 : 69)

Aku ingin menjadi orang yang berjihad itu.
Berjihad dengan sebenar-benar jihad.
Sesungguhnya melawan hawa nafsu itu juga jihad.

Untuk melawan hawa nafsu kita perlu kenal ia terlebih dahulu.
Ada tiga tahap.
Nafsu ammarah (selalu menyuruh kpd kejahatan)
Nafsu lawwamah (terumbang-ambing antara kebaikan dan kejahatan)
Nafsu mutmainnah (hati yang tenang dan damai mengabdikan diri kepada Allah)

Aku berada di tahap yang kedua.
Ingin sekali aku berada di tahap yang ketiga.
Ya Allah bantu aku kesana.
Beri aku kekuatan dan kesabaran.
Kerana jalan ini bukan untuk orang-orang yang manja seperti aku.
Perlu pengorbanan untuk kesana.

Ku ulang pada diriku sendiri.


Wednesday, May 6, 2009



Hidup bagaimanakah yang engkau rasa bahagia
Penuh makna ada cita
Diri yang sudah tidak lagi punya pertimbangan
Menerima apa sahaja
Dalam pencarian menentukan arah tujuan
Berbekalkan hanya perasaan
Hanya mengikut arus perjalanan rakan-rakan
Juga gaya teman-teman
Wahai sekalian rakan
Dengarlah, ini pesanan
Kami adalah teman
Yang inginkan kebaikan
Pencarianmu itu
Tak ada kesudahannya
Jika kau tak bertanya
Pada Tuhan yang memberikan jawapan
Telah dinyatakan tujuan kita diciptakan
Bukan untuk ini semua
Masa depan agama dan nasib yang tak terbela
Semuanya di tangan kita
Pemuda yang semangat jihadnya teguh di hati
Tidak akan gentar dicabar
Tinta emas yang mencatatkan sejarah gemilang
Telah pasti ia kan berulang
Yang perlu hanya kesedaran
Bersama diri yang ada kekuatan
Iman dan kesabaran
Yang mesti diusahakan
Banggalah dengan gayamu
Hidup seorang pejuang
Nyatakan pada dunia
Masa depan untuk Islam, untuk kita
dipetik dr

Saturday, May 2, 2009

Aku dan Masa Laluku


Aku dan masa laluku
Masa lalu yang berhantu
Sehingga aku selalu bersedih
tanpa henti tanpa misi tanpa aksi

Kata sahabatku,
" Kenapa liza nak bersedih dgn masa lalu, 1 detik yang berlalu kita dah consider it as semalam, semalam2 sejarah, hari nie kita punya, esok x siapa tahu, jadi setiap detik baru mulakanlah dgn niat dan azam yang baru "

Kata sahabatku lagi,
" liza, learn from the past, don't live with it "

Kata sahabatku lagi,
" sampai bila liza nk harapkn kitorg utk selalu naikkn semangat liza time liza down?? "

Kata sahabatku lagi,
" it's within urself liza, let it go, don't think about it anymore, forget it "

Kata sahabatku lagi,
" Allah paling suka hambaNya apabila dia melakukan kesalahan dia terus bertaubat "

Aku telah banyak kali dengar kata2 itu
Bukan sekali, dua atau tiga

Kukatakan padanya aku berhati lembut berjiwa degil
Adakah benar aku begitu?
Ya..dan tidak juga

Kadang-kadang hati ini terasa letih
Letih kerana masih menyimpan perasaan itu
Masih berharap suatu yang palsu
Mengikut hawa nafsu

Namun jauh di sudut hati, aku tahu
Aku tahu apa yang aku mahu
Apa yang aku mahu???

Aku dan masa laluku
Akan teruskah begitu??
Belum mahu lagikah aku biarkan ia berlalu???
Liza, biarkanlah ia berlalu
Itu masa lalumu
Kesat air matamu
Buang angan2 palsumu
Hela nafas baru
Mula langkah baru

Aku dan masa laluku
Aku ingin jauh darimu
Pergi, pergi, jauh kau dariku
Jauh, jauh, usah kembali padaku

p/s: nie post pertamaku y terlalu sentimental...harap maklum=)